MY STARTING PLACE

I never really thought I ever blog, but look at me... blogging!

I guess I really need an outlet to the world, in the hopes that someone else might get some comfort and support from my search for internal comfort and support.

To be honest, so much is going on in my life right now, I think of this is a way of helping sort things out and making sense of it to me, and maybe to others.

Here's what's going on: 1) My wife of 3 years has persistent mental illness and we're trying to find therapy/meds/social interaction combinations that will help her have a life worthy of her talents and abilities; 2) Finances are extremely tight, as we only have my income to live on; 3) We were trying to help a homeless woman through our work at the local warming shelter and it blew up in our faces; 4) The finacial situation has directly impacted on our relationship to our pastor, who had to finally let us know she can't help us out anymore with $$.

Oh, and in case you might have missed it, I am a lesbian.  Just a few other important facts - politically liberal, person of faith, avid reader, and extremely curious.

When I lived in Portland OR and used public transportation, I thought about writing a column [shows you how long ago that was!] called "Life in the Bus Lane."  But now that I live in a trailer park, the title came as kind of a sequel.  

I'm still living pay-check to pay-check, there's still more month than money, but now I have my wife and all our cats (4 or 6 or 7, depending on how you count them) to support.  I wouldn't have it any other way - my wife is the love of my life [you'll undoubtedly be hearing all about her in future posts].  And because she is, there are so many things I want for both of us.

Another important fact is I'm 63 and she's 47.  Lotta years inbetween us, and not much time left, either.  When we first got together, my sister kept telling my wife, "You know, she's almost 60!"  All the more reason to seize the day.

Enough intro.

Currently I'm reading "Scarcity: why having too little means so much" by Sendhil Mullainathan and Eldar Shafir.  I shouldn't be surprised that even the first 50 or so pages has already given me lots to think about and directly relates to our current financial situation. [I definitely suscribe to the theory that books often find us, not the other way around.]  Experiments have shown that just the thought of scarcity can directly impact cognitive responses.  "Tickling" the scarcity part of the brain can impact a person the same as going without sleep for a night.  Unreal.

This, for me, ties into another book I read some time ago, but which I think everyone should read: "Don't Think of an Elephant" by George Lakoff.  In it , Lakoff shows us that people will vote against their own best interests if the concept is framed a certain way.  Words and their meanings, both conscious and unconscious, greatly affects our actions.  

I want to use the framing concept to help us look at our situation in a way that helps us and makes us feel more secure.  It's a lofty goal, but changing how we look at things doesn't cost us money out of pocket.

I don't know if this is any way to start blogging, but since I'm using the blog as a type of journal, this is how I started blogging.

I hope anyone who reads this has a good day.  I know I'm going to do my best to do so.

Keep reading!